Meyers-Briggs exercise spawns agency turf war.

JKM News Dec 02, 2011

The JAN Kelley Senior Management Team was shocked to find they now face a budding gang crisis across the traditionally friendly agency. The divisiveness stemmed from a Meyers-Briggs session where staff-member personality types were identified and analyzed in an effort to aid workplace harmony and productivity. Toward the later stages of the session, rival factions made up of “Perceivers”, characterized by their flexible and spontaneous approach to life, and “Judgers”, who prefer more structure, were showing signs of clashing.

Less than two hours later, the first signs of the turf war were revealed as a spray painted gang tag was found just outside the boardroom – the apparent efforts of those affiliated with the North Side Judgers. It was also worried that recruitment was taking place for the Original Pragmatic Perceivers, as a song entitled “O.P.P” blasted from speakers situated near the agency’s studio.

Despite the quick escalation of this situation, Roger Gonsalves, head of the JAN Kelley Gang Control Task Unit, doesn’t see this being a long term problem. “While we are keeping tabs on this, the early numbers indicate this isn’t as widespread as first thought”, says Gonsalves, noting that gang membership is estimated at under 30% of staff. However, his investigation has been plagued by allegations of corruption – most based on the Gonsalves’ surname and, thereby, his potential involvement in the Mexican drug cartels. The Task Unit has managed to detain one subject for further questioning. Associate Creative Director, Stew Farago, is currently facing reprimand for flashing the O.P.P’s signature hand sign while walking past the window of a full meeting room.